OMG, Trump, like, seriously? You think you can just dump us like I was dumped last week? News flash, you're not as cool as you think you are with your whole "America First" vibe. Like, migration and drug issues? Not our fault, dude. You can't just solve everything with tariffs or whatever, that's so last century.
 

Let me break it down for you, since your brain seems to be on vacation. We've been, like, helping migrants because, hello, they're people? And FYI, your little country's weapons are all over our streets, causing chaos. So maybe look in the mirror before you start pointing fingers. Oh, and about those tariffs? Yeah, we'll just hit you back with our own. It'll be like a never-ending game of "who can make life harder for their own people?"
 

And honestly, Trump, I thought we had something special, you know? Like, we could talk about real stuff, not just trade and drugs. But nooo, you had to go all dramatic. Whatever, I'm over it. We'll find new friends, and maybe you'll realize that being a total jerk isn't exactly the way to win friends and influence people. So, let's sit down, talk like adults, and sort this mess out, or I swear, I'll make you regret ever messing with me.
 

Peace out,
 

Colombia